Y'all. This is an actual conversation I had in the car with Roman this past Friday. I was driving, but I pulled over to type it all into my phone. (Curse you, tiny keyboard!)
Me: What do you want to be for Halloween, Rome?
Roman: I wanna be Dark Vader. (<--He never got the Darth Vader memo, and we didn't have the heart to correct him on that.)
Me: No you were Dark Vader last year- you gotta choose something different this year.
Roman: I wanna be a toaster. (<--Whoa! Major plot twist- where he got that one from is anyone's guess!)
Me: (reflecting on his lifelong passion for carbs) That would be pretty perfect.
Roman: I like toasters.
Me: And toast!
The conversation cools for a half a minute, during which I imagine his mind's eye is watching me butter two hot slabs of perfectly tanned Miche loaf from Standard Bakery, before forking them over. Without even taking a bite. Because one can dream...
Roman: (reconsidering, shakes his head) No, i wanna be a hot dog. Lu (his big sister Lucca) wants to be a cat woman.
Me: Lu gets to choose her own outfit, Rome.
Roman: I wanna be a hot dog. That would be funny. (<--Whatttt? That would be funny!?! Nice use of the conditional tense, Roman! Not to mention HUMOR! Verbalizing the intention to make other people laugh, in an appropriate way. Predicting future behavior. He wants to be FUNNY for Halloween? Mind? Blown.)
Me: That WOULD be funny!
Roman: Lu wants to be a vampire.
Me: Well she gets to choose.
Roman: (explaining to Lucca) You have to put on a mask and then you'll be a scary vampire. (<--Articulating a recent realization about our most creepy holiday- it's just other people in masks. Could it be that this is the year he actually goes trick-or-treating, and doesn't retreat back to the house with me after the town parade, manning the candy bowl and trying to snipe candy out of other kiddo's bags?)
Why did I immediately turn off the radio and cross two lanes of traffic - Jack Bauer style - desperately trying to keep all this crammed into my sieve short term memory long enough to commit it to digital memory? Because this is the LONGEST conversation I have ever had with the Romanator. Ever. Seven whole exchanges! Woot woot!
On point, relevant, and cussword-free. Hot buttered damn!
PS Nine years ago: Romi as the Devil (no comment) with big sister Lucca as a wood nymph.